Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Opposite Comments...

When I'm out and about with my kids (which is pretty much every day), I get lots of comments. 99.99% of them are nice.  Mostly, I hear "boy, do you have your hands full!" And I have two standard answers to that. Sometimes I say "Yes. The best kind of full," but if I'm feeling as if my hands really are particularly full in that moment, sometimes I just say "Yep. Always." And then smile so that they don't think I'm on my way to the zoo to drop them off there permanently. Not that I've ever threatened my children with that. Ahem.

But there are two other comments that I get that make me laugh because they are complete opposites from each other.

The first: "Oh, do you run a daycare?" Or "Do you keep kids?" (I only have three... maybe it's that they move so fast it looks like more?)

The second: "He looks like you!" (um, what? He's Ethiopian... I'm, well, some kind of mish-mash of western European plus Swedish maybe.)

One day I was out with my friend who also has three kids and our children are almost exactly the same ages. We were at Chick-Fil-A for an hour or so with all our kids. In that hour, two separate people asked us if we run a daycare!  Weird.  But I get that comment when I'm out with my three by myself. Or asked if I'm babysitting (I credit that one to how incredibly young I look... bahaha)

Today someone came up to me and was saying hi to Amani and once she established that he was mine she said, "Oh is he mixed?" I explained that he was adopted from Ethiopia and she said, "Really? I just really can see that he looks like you."  Because I still haven't come up with a good answer to that one, I just said "Thanks! That makes my heart happy!" Although I'm not yet convinced that's the most appropriate response.

But I do have a theory I thought I'd put out there to see what y'all think.  My thought is this: we are all humans, so of course we have lots of similarities.  And we know that, biologically, children are a mix-up of their parents. So I think that our brains are trained to see pieces of parents in children.  Kind of like those optical illusions where the letters are missing chunks but you can read the words anyway.  I think, especially if it's just me and Amani, people are seeing our common human-ness and mistake it for him looking like me because of genetics.  And I think it's cool that God would make us all so different AND so similar at the same time.

It's just a made-up theory. But I kinda like it.

Can you see a resemblance?


  1. Sounds a bit like Kevin Bacon's 'six degrees of separation'.
    (originally considered to be an urban myth, it now appears that anyone on the planet can be connected in just a few steps of association).
    No doubt in my mind he's YOUR son! and MY great-nephew!!!
    love & big hugs to all.....

  2. He looks just like you:) I,ve also heard that my daughter from China looks like me. I always fumble because it is just weird!


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