Saturday, May 26, 2012

The Mommy Network vs. Mommy Wars

I know, I know. I'm late in the game if I'm just now posting about the Time Magazine article with the extended-breastfeeding mom nursing her three year old on the cover. I actually didn't plan to write about it at all.

The cover wasn't all that shocking to me. One of my closest friends nursed her daughter until she was two and maybe even longer. I'm not sure 'cause it just wasn't a big deal. I nursed my first two babies until they were 18 months and only that long because that's when they both stopped (weird that they both stopped at the same age!) But my youngest was not only formula-fed, he wasn't even FDA-approved-formula fed.  And you know what? Another of my closest friends nursed for just a few weeks before deciding that the best thing for her and her baby was to switch to formula.  And all of our children are thriving. And all of us are good moms.

I think covers like the Time Magazine only serve to fuel the Mommy Wars. Full time mamas vs. stay-at-home mamas. Cry-it-out mamas vs. Co-sleeping mamas. Pain-med-free mamas vs. "please-give-me-that-epidural-before-I-kill-you" mamas.  Bio mamas vs. Adoptive mamas.  The list could go on and on and on forever.

And magazine articles like that highlight those wars.  And those wars rage on, I'm sure.  But I don't think they're as prevalent as the media would like us to think.  There is something stronger in Mommy-World:

The Mom Network.

I've blogged about this before.  I have a network of mamas all around me that I know I can rely on at any given moment.  I know exactly who I can call when I have a diaper-rash question, when I have a discipline issue, when I need to talk to someone who knows what it's like to lose it and yell at your kids.  And I can do those things without being judged.  I can honestly say I've never had any real personal experience with the Mom Wars.  The Moms around me do all of those things on that list up there: cry-it-out, co-sleep, formula, breast-feed, work, stay-at-home, you-name-it.

It's just that a story about how moms really work together and support each other in raising our kids isn't going to sell as many magazines.

I am writing about this today because this happened on facebook:

And the list went further than that, I'm just not technologically saavy enough to figure out to capture a screen image if I have to scroll.  And did you see that? I got advice, offers to keep my kids, support, encouragement, and a sweet nostalgic memory.

So here's to the Mommy Network. I think it beats the Mommy Wars.
Every time.
Even if it doesn't sell magazines.

And a giant THANK YOU to all of the mamas in my life. The journey of motherhood is not one I'm walking alone and I thank God every day for the other moms he has put in my life. I love y'all. Lots.

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